Christmas is normally my favourite time of year and I couldn't wait to spend it with our new baby and neither could our families. Instead I found myself dreading it. Everything reminded me of Jack.
We woke up on Christmas morning and werent in any particular hurry to get up, there was nothing to celebrate. If it hadnt been for the fact that I had to cook a pork for our family lunch I probably wouldnt have bothered getting up when I did.
About a month before Christmas I ordered a beautiful candle in memory of Jack that was to go on the table at lunch. We forgot to light it (which Im kind of glad because it seems such a shame to melt it). We honoured Jack with a toast to him before we ate, which was beautiful and so sad.
My neice and nephew bought a bauble for the Christmas Tree which was blue and had Jack's name on it in glitter. It is lovely and something we will always treasure and bring out each year.
My husband and I each bought gifts for each other from Jack. It was very emotional opening our presents without our son.
Christmas will never be the same again, it will always feel empty.
I was glad when it was all over. Glad that a new year would be starting soon but also sad that we were saying goodbye to the year that our angel was born.
I love the candle! It is beautiful. That is so sweet that your niece and nephew bought a bauble for the tree with Jack's name on it. I feel the same way, Christmas will never feel the same again. There will always be something and someone missing.
ReplyDeletexx
The candle is fantastic, really special.
ReplyDeleteWe too have a Christmas decoration from last year and this year we were given a pink snowflake in memory of Abigail for the tree.
Can I ask is the "Meet you at the Sunset" only for women? It seems to suggest that so I have stayed clear. I wouldn't want to be the only man. But it seems a shame that there are few enough men out there blogging about baby loss and all the BLM talk doesn't always encourage them. Just a thought.
Take care and peace for 2010
M
I love that candle. It's beautiful! I feel like a lot of us who have lost our babies felt similar during the holidays and the new year. Thinking of you. Take care. XO
ReplyDeleteHello, It is Lisa from Jasper, Forever our first born. I wanted to let
ReplyDeleteyou know that I wrote your angels name and took some pictures and wanted
to give them to you. I am doing this for all the angels on the blogs that
I follow. Here is the link. I hope you like them.
http://waterfallangels.blogspot.com/2010/02/jack.html
I love that candle! Beautiful.
The candle is beautiful, thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone for you comments....
ReplyDeleteMichael, thanks for your kind words and may 2010 bring you some peace too.
I dont see why you cant participate in "Meet You At The Sunset". There is a lot of references to 'BLM's' but I guess thats just because there are a lot more women out there than men that are blogging about their grief. But in any case I think it would be lovely if you would like to join in one of the meetings, it would be a nice change to read about a male's perspective.
x0x0